In the interest of public safety, if you are a person who enjoys a pasty on the train home in the evenings... stay the hell away from me, m'kay? (Not sure what a pasty is? Check out the offending provider's website here.)

Seriously, those things are like little shortcrust parcels of stink! The offending smell seems to get into every olfactory nook and cranny I own and tips me right over the edge. I walk a fine line of being a good hearted commuter on the best of days (what? at least I admit it), but shove a pasty or some other form of offensive foodstuff near me in a cramped, confined space and I tend to get ... rather cranky.

I watched the man across from me last night sit and unattractively shovel one into his mouth over the course of about ten minutes. The weird thing was that he ate pretty much the entire thing with his eyes closed.

After he was finished, I did check to see if he had some kind of explainatory eye condition.. but nope, apres smelly pasty he was all happy, blinky and wide eyed.

This made me wonder.. am I missing out on the most delicious meal on the planet? I'd find it hard to believe... A mass produced pastry shell filled with various savoury fillings (including massive amounts of E numbers, more sodium than you need in a week and other things you'd probably be better off not knowing about) that's been sitting in a train station display case for Bejebus only knows how long?

Uh, no thanks.

I think I'll stick to my usual evening train diet that consists of air, breathing, playing Scrabble and being impatient. I'm a happy, happy commuter and don't you forget it.